so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
i dont even know how to be here
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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