woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
