She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
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Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
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She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
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