I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
