there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
