dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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