Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
We left the knife in your bed.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Randomize
