and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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