Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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