True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
