that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
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