I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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