dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
NoShamevember. You game?
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
