Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Randomize
