Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
