let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Someone came in the potted fern
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
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