hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Randomize
