Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
you made out with another girl for some wings
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
