I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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