I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
My pussy is not your playground.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
me + whiskey = a bad person
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
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