If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
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