She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
