Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I'm passing your future prison.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
