I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
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Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
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Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
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