I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
