check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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