If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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