yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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