That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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