I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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