You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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