return my video game
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
