Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
