Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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