All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
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