3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
