And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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