Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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