Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
