Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
