it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
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