I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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