dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
