i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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