Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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