This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Randomize
