i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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