I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
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