im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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