You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
How external is "for external use only"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize